DISSENT OF MAN
"Yes, Professor, you always excelled,
We approved of the views that you held,
But you see, Dr. Stein,
You have now crossed the line
And we're happy to say you're expelled."

VOTE THE ROCK
If Obama is offering false hope,
Miss "Experience" really can't cope,
And it's hard to explain
What we get with McCain,
Then I think I will vote for the pope.

EXPERIENCE
Any student of crime comprehends
How to halve higher homicide trends:
He knows rates will decrease
Without adding police
When the Clintons stop killing their friends.

THE END
Though I'm no Clinton fan, I do find,
As support for his wife has declined,
That I'm actually beginning
To wish she were winning,
'Cause I can't stand to see her behind.

THE POLITICS OF
PERSONAL CONSTRUCTION
"I brought Belfast the peace they desire
And in Bosnia dodged sniper fire!
I'm impossibly grand
And cannot understand
Why I'm called an incorrigible liar!"

CHOCOLATE PIETY
"Look how far we have come in the fight;
We've discovered a new civil right:
If a person is black,
He is free to attack,
'Cause a racist can only be white."

SPITZER
"New York State Attorney General" rang fine,
"New York Governor" sounded divine,
And yet even more eminent
Would have been "U.S. President"
-- But, instead, he is now "Number 9."

SWIFT BOATS IS A-COMIN'
Here's a question for Mr. McCain:
Do you think you could deign to explain
Why you don't seem to mind
That we left men behind
-- Are you callous, corrupt, or insane?

BOHICA
We survived Bill and Jimmy and Jack
-- Every one an incompetent hack --
And it's certain we will
Survive Mrs. Bill
Or her radical rival, Barack.

0BAMA
"You say I'm selling hope
As if it were a soap,
But, by being hip
And saying zip,
I hope to rope a dope."

ME SHELL
An American naturally jeers
When appalled by a comment he hears:
"The first time in my life
I am proud," said a wife
Who has slept through the last 40 years.

CHANGE
Super delegates may have it rough
When selecting a favorite is tough,
But they're up to the task
When they just have to ask:
"Isn't one impeached Clinton enough?"

BAILOUT
True conservatives simply abhor,
And could never consent to vote for,
Any nominee who
Would abandon them, too,
Like he did to our prisoners of war.

HAPPY MARDI GRAS!
When the spirit of carnival reigns,
Sober citizens unplug their brains;
Egotists in disguises
Are proffering prizes
To propel presidential campaigns.

H STANDS FOR HATE
Hillary's known for intolerant views:
She hates blacks, she hates Christians and Jews,
She hates soldiers and cops
And all men who aren't fops --
She's the candidate haters will choose.

RERUN FOR PRESIDENT
"Now at last is my destiny reached!"
Mrs. Megalomaniac screeched,
And follow she will
In the footsteps of Bill
When a Clinton again is impeached.

TAILSPIN
She knew that she would win,
But she took it on the chin;
Now she's lost the crown
And she's spiraling down,
Still believing in her own spin.